Years ago, I studied a form of Karate called Gōjū-ryū, which means “hard and soft.” This duality fascinated me. On one hand, the martial art was about sharp, decisive movements; on the other, fluid, adaptable ones. Strength and flexibility in perfect harmony. 

Learning how to deal with apparent opposites is a major growth edge for many top executives I coach. The fact is, leadership inherently means living in a land of dualities. Growth and stability. Innovation and tradition. Directing and empowering.

Consider for yourself:

• What dualities are you currently navigating in your leadership?

• Are there areas where you’re leaning too far into one side at the expense of the other?

If you lean too far into one side, the other can suffer. Go too “hard,” and you risk rigidity. Too much “soft,” and you might lack direction. True leadership embraces both.

How to Balance Dualities

The trick? It’s not either/or. It’s both/and. Balancing dualities is where leadership magic happens. Here are three common examples:

• Decisiveness and Patience: Great leaders know when to act decisively to seize opportunities and when to exercise patience to allow clarity to emerge. Balancing urgency with thoughtful timing creates impactful decisions.

• Structure and Creativity: Foster innovation by creating a framework that provides clear guidance and boundaries while leaving enough space for imagination and original ideas to thrive. Productivity and innovation can coexist.

• Confidence and Vulnerability: You can project self-confidence while also being willing to admit mistakes, ask for help, and show your human side. This balance allows leaders to connect deeply with their teams through a combination of strength and relatability.

5 Amare Action Steps to Master Dualities

1. Identify your hard and soft. Reflect on your leadership style. Where can you add strength without losing flexibility, and vice versa?

2. Reframe the opposites. Look at an apparent duality in your work (e.g., purpose vs. profit) and brainstorm ways to integrate them.

3. Practice balance. In your next decision, consciously consider both sides of the equation—movement and stillness, logic and intuition—and find the harmony.

4. Model both/and thinking. Encourage your team to see opportunities for integration rather than division. Reward solutions that embrace duality.

5. Embrace adaptability. Remember, what’s hard now may need to be soft later, and vice versa. Leadership is about flowing with the needs of the moment.

Leadership: A Hard and Soft Skill

The beauty of dualities is they challenge us to grow. They ask us to be strong yet flexible, purposeful yet profitable, decisive yet patient. Leading the Amare Way, putting the power of love to work, means embracing both sides—the hard and the soft—with love and wisdom.

As you reflect on your leadership for this year, think about your Gōjū-ryū moments. Where can you bring strength? Where can you add flexibility? And how can you embrace the art of both/and in everything you do? After all, true leadership isn’t about choosing sides. It’s about finding harmony—and sometimes, even a little humor—in the dance of dualities.

Do You Feel Called to Improve as a Leader?

Are you willing to be all you can be as a leader? Consider starting 2025 with the gift of professional coaching. I have an opening in my Strong Start Leadership Coaching Program at the moment. Contact me for more info.

Today’s Amare Wave Wednesday Quote

“The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.” 

— F. Scott Fitzgerald

Click here and read more Amare Wave Wednesday newsletters on related topics:

Five Ways to Manage Conflicting Points of View with a “Both/And” Approach

How to Take a Stand and Stay Connected: Five Highly Effective Steps

How to Balance Daily Tasks and Big Dreams: A Leadership Lesson from a Powerful 17th Century Renaissance Man

When Enough is Enough: The Two Sides of “Enough” Great Leaders Must Master

Balanced Decision-Making: Five Steps to “Makes Sense” and “Feels Right”