Moshe’s Blog

The Instant Gratification Trap: The Power of Patience in Leadership

I was in a sushi restaurant recently, enjoying a quiet meal, when something caught my eye. A young guy at the next table had a T-shirt that said, “Everything You Want… Instantly!”

Turns out, it was an old T-shirt advertising AOL broadband (because nothing screams instant gratification like dial-up internet!). While the shirt was vintage, the promise it made was anything but: instant gratification.

Why Instant Gratification Can Undermine Your Leadership

When you look forward, it’s easy to get bogged down in thinking about what you don’t have yet or what’s standing in your way. Instead, look back with your imagination from an end-of-year perspective. Don’t ask “How will we do this?” Ask “What did we do to get here?” and use that wisdom to drive future success.

No, this isn’t some “manifestation magic” that skips the hard work. It’s about shifting your mindset to be actively engaged in the future you want today. You’re leading with confidence, purpose, and the belief that your success is not only possible, it is already so.

So, Why Do We Fall For It?

Because it’s tempting! When you can get quick feedback or instant returns, it feels rewarding. But what we miss is that quick results often aren’t sustainable. They don’t build the long-term trust or resilience that truly successful leaders are known for.

Leadership is about building something that lasts—and that takes time, persistence, and yes, a lot of patience. New research shows that self-control and the ability to delay gratification are key predictors of success—especially in leadership.

Patience Really is a Virtue After All: Who Knew!

As a seasoned leader, you know better than anyone that quick fixes often lead to bigger problems down the road. It’s that immediate satisfaction that gets us in trouble, even if it feels good at the moment.

The reality is that patience, love, and long-term thinking are the backbone of effective leadership that lasts. It’s not just about waiting—it’s about waiting with purpose.

Consider this:

What do you really want?

How important is instant gratification to you?

In what areas of your life or business might patience lead to better, longer-lasting outcomes?

6 Amare Action Steps for Leading with Patience

1. Embrace the discomfort. Growth happens beyond the edge of your comfort zone. Lean into the discomfort and trust the process of things unfolding at the right pace.

2. Celebrate the process, not just the outcome. Shift your focus from results to the journey itself. Celebrate the small wins and the effort to motivate your team to keep working toward the bigger goal.

3. Stop always being the fixer. It’s tempting to jump in and solve a problem immediately, but resist! Instead, give your team the space to solve their own issues. For tips, check out this article.

4. Reflect on your past decisions. Think back to times when you chose instant gratification over patience. Now, list five things you learned (no self-punishment, please!).

5. Create a culture of strategic patience. Instill in your team the value of long-term thinking. Give concrete examples. When you show patience, your team will follow your lead.

6. Think long-term. Focus on what’s right instead of just what’s fast. Set priorities that support long-term goals and make space for thoughtful decision-making.

Avoiding the Leadership Trap of ‘Instant Results’

Temptation and instant gratification are powerful forces, especially in leadership. The best leaders know that success isn’t about rushing to the finish line—it’s about strategically delaying gratification to build something sustainable and lasting.

Whether it’s resisting the urge to step in and solve a problem or embracing the marshmallow test for your decisions, remember this: patience isn’t passive—it’s proactive. Lead with patience, and you’ll find that the rewards are sweeter (and longer-lasting) than anything instant gratification can offer.

So, the next time you feel the urge to eat that one marshmallow, take a deep breath, resist the temptation, and wait for the bigger reward. Your future self—and your team—will thank you for it.

Inspire Your Team to Build Resilience & Put the Power of Love to Work

I do powerful keynotes and retreats centered on creating love-powered organizations and helping leadership teams build resilience. For more info, contact me here.